I have pets.

Pets are kind of like kids, except pets take naps and leave you alone. And they don’t talk. And they eat out of the designated bowl that you have given them, no cooking required.

Pets don’t pick up after themselves, but then again, they don’t really make messes to speak of.

Besides the copious amounts of dog hair and bird dust that I vacuum from my floors on a daily basis (warning: I would shield my eyes and scroll down quickly if I were you…)

Yes, that is ONE DAY’S worth of dog hair…and I vacuum every single day.  The vacuuming is a job in itself around here!

What is my point (besides the fact that my dogs lose unreasonable amounts of hair on a daily basis)?

Kids are hard work, man.

Kids have to do homework. And read. And you have to be sure that you’re not swearing in front of them. And you have to feed them balanced meals–meals that are cooked, not poured from a bag.

And they usually need something. They’re either hungry or thirsty or tired or bored. They’re not usually content without the help of an adult.

And they want to shop for Halloween costumes in the WalmarK on a Saturday afternoon when there are clearly 5 solid weeks in which to properly procrastinate the choosing of a Halloween costume.

What, you say?!

Good Moms don’t procrastinate?!

You’re probably right.  But it’s exhausting. And I don’t know how Mom’s make it look so easy. It’s probably an immersion type of thing. The immersion of a child in your life from birth causes your schedule to shift and transform. You develop a routine, a peaceful method to life–a smooth way to make your day flow.

When a child comes into your home and you’ve not been properly immersed, it’s a little chaotic.

A lot chaotic.

My Gazelle’s wonderful 8-year-old nephew will be part of our lives at least every weekend from now on.  It’s difficult to make this transition when you don’t have the appropriate “kid stuff” already in your house.

“Wanna play with my CD collection?”

“Here, read ‘Eat, Drink, and Be Vegan’–it’s awesome!”

Uh.  Not so much.  I couldn’t even hook him with ‘Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World’, and that one has some sweet photography!

Since I couldn’t get him interested in my impressive cookbook collection, we bought these instead.

The second dilemma?  Peeling this child away from the TV and electronics.  I am not a proponent of sticking kids in front of the TV or handing them a PSP for entertainment.  I love imaginations and playtime and getting outside.  As Uncle Gazelle told him “there are no lazy people in this house”.

So, how do you break a child from the habit of grabbing the PSP or turning on the TV when they’re bored?

This is a new project that I’m taking on willingly and lovingly.  In addition to running and cooking and cleaning and working.  Moms…how the heck do you do this?  I hope you will all join me on this next life adventure.  It should be entertaining.

I love him, he is sweet and well-behaved and shy and soft-spoken like his uncle.  But I’m surprised that my house is clean, my dishes are done, and I am wearing clean clothes. Because kids are a lot of work.

And now, I’m going to watch trashy TV.  It just feels right.

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